Day 5 – Madeira: Porto Moniz & Calheta

I slept in until 10am which was much needed after yesterday’s hike. My body was tired and I didn’t have it in me to wake up for another sunrise hike so I took advantage of sleeping in before check out. Stelios woke up early and enjoyed breakfast at the hotel and walked to the downtown while I slept. By 11am we packed up our bags and checked out of the hotel. I needed something to eat before our hour long drive to our second destination so we decided to turn left out of our hotel instead of right (which brings you to Funchal). We found a bakery called Boutique Lido that had outdoor tables and I ordered a ham & cheese Misto (sandwich) and iced latte. Yes – they actually had iced lattes here, a rare find in Europe, but also a sign this was a tourist spot. I didn’t care because the sun was strong this morning and the iced latte was so yummy and refreshing. It seems that the whole Lido area is super touristy and I’m glad we didn’t waste our time exploring it.

We walked back to the car and it was time to head to our second destination of the trip: Porto Moniz, a town on the North west side of the island. The hour long drive along ER101 was stunning – it’s basically a highway running through the valley in between 2 mountain ranges and it reminded me of driving through Hawaii near the Kualoa ranch (where Jurassic park was filmed). 

Arriving in Porto Moniz, we couldn’t find our hotel at first even though Google maps said we had arrived, so I got out of the car to ask a worker and he pointed me in the right direction. There was construction going on which made the entrance to the hotel pretty hidden. The receptionist gave me a parking pass card and we dropped our luggage in the lobby and drove the car 2 mins to the parking deck. On the walk back both Stelios and I realized this area was VERY different than lovely Funchal and other towns we previously drove through. 

I fear we have landed in a tourist trap. 

All of the restaurants in this town had pictures of the food plastered on the entrance (a red flag) and just from walking around it was clearly ALL tourists. Yikes. 

I realize that Stelios & I are also both technically tourists, but I consider us travelers. While we do stop at popular sites depending on the destination (like the Eiffel Tower in Paris) our general travel style is to stay out of the crowded tourist zones when possible to try and experience the local culture.

The reason we chose to stay in Porto Moniz is because we wanted to experience life on the northern side of the island, and I didn’t want to stay in the same town or hotel for all 10 days of our trip. My first choice was staying at a Quinta in Santana but it was completely booked up, so then I read about Porto Moniz which was closer to Seixal Beach, Sao Vicente, and Santana (some of the northern towns that we wanted to explore) also rather than driving an hour or more each day from Funchal, it was only a 30-40 minutes drive from Porto Moniz. Alas, this plan backfired, as I did not account for the weather to be so gloomy and rainy on this side of the island, nor did I anticipate it being a total tourist zone. Luckily we have a car so we are not stuck here by any means, and really will just be at the hotel to sleep. At least we have a cool view from our room.

We decided to grab lunch at the best rated cafe I could find in Porto Moniz on Google Maps & then go for an afternoon hike. We shared a steak sandwich and pork sandwich, but the steak was much better.

The drive took us up ER101 to the top of the mountain. The fog was so thick and dense we could only see about 10 feet in front of us. Unfortunately the hike we picked did not lead us out of the misty cloud. Stelios wanted to do the hike anyway but I knew I would be miserable hiking 4 miles in the mist, soaking wet. I quickly pulled up my AllTrails App and found a Levada walk in Calheta, 25 mins away where my weather app said it was sunny. Begrudgingly, Stelios listened and we continued to drive 25 mins to the Levada. As we continued driving the fog was very dense, but once we got to the other side and started going down the mountain the skies opened up and it was completely blue and sunny! We looked behind us and came to the realization that we drove through a literal cloud that formed above the top of the mountain. 

Down below it looked like a completely different day or area compared to the rainy gloomy north that we had come from. I was so happy we pivoted – vacation is meant for sunshine! We got to our Levada starting point and started the walk.

This Levada was much wider than the first one we did and it had some ocean views in the distance. At the end of the Levada we came to a trail covered with weeds and brush, the All Trails app said to continue and that the path would loop around but we also debated just turning around and just following the Levada back since the walk there was pretty picturesque. Ultimately we decided to push through the brush, only to be brought to a road path at the top. Oh well. We walked the rest of the loop path up a steep incline to the car and definitely got our glute workout for the day. 

After the Levada walk we were ready for a bite to eat and I was craving seafood. We drove 15 mins down to Calheta beach and grabbed an outdoor table at Golden Calheta, a seafood restaurant with tables looking out at the marina. I ordered the white sangria and Stelios ordered the red, and we had the tuna steak and black scabbard fish risotto to share. The risotto dish may be the best I’ve ever had, topped with the local Madeiran fish and drizzled with passion fruit on top. For dessert the waitress recommended the Banoffee, which apparently was a British dessert – a pie crust topped with caramel and whipped cream. 

After dinner we planned to drive back towards our hotel and catch the sunset from Ponta Lighthouse but the sun set behind a wall of thick clouds so there wouldn’t be much of a sunset tonight. We continued to drive to our hotel and slept with the windows open, which is quite possible the only benefit of staying in Porto Moniz which is falling asleep to the sounds of the ocean waves crashing on the shoreline. Overall we turned a rainy day into a beautiful sunny adventure.